Happy Happy Dad's Day!
I think the kids and I did a pretty good job of making Father's Day happy for the super special Dad of our little family today. Nick had a fun morning out golfing with his friend Matt while the super-sister Diane and I wrangled the kids at home. After golf, our friends Seth and Jen came for a quick visit and then my sweet friend Thea and her daughter Lane brought over every dad's fantasy dinner- KFC! (that's Kentucky Fried Chicken to you crazy health nuts) After dinner we opened Father's Day gifts which included tiny remote controlled helicopters. Of course there were two- one for Nick and one for Fisher. Oh yes, I'm a smart mom, this is definitely not my first rodeo. Nick and Fisher had a blast with them in the front yard until it got dark, then they brought them inside and flew some more. Yes, that's Fisher holding his helicopter in the photo, I think he's planning on sleeping with it.
Our weekend turned out exactly as we had hoped, I was feeling healthy the whole time (no fevers!) and we were able to have a BBQ Friday night, lunch AND dinner Saturday out at restaurants, and a special Father's Day for Nick today. I call how I'm feeling "the new normal". Meaning I'm not sick or in any pain, but I do always have the discomfort of my expanders in my chest, always feel somewhat fatigued (at least one nap a day is mandatory) and I always have kind of an odd "buzz" which reminds me that things are not quite right. But I definitely do have moments where I don't notice any of these things and am just having fun, like tonight watching Nick and Fisher fly their helicopters in the yard at dusk.
This crazy illness has opened my eyes to many things in a new light. Over the past two months especially, I have witnessed Nick's strength and courage in many, many ways. I am in love with way he is deeply involved in every aspect of my health care, running his business so intelligently and efficiently- and succeeding in this crazy economy, managing the majority of my "mom" duties when I'm not feeling well enough to perform (more often than not), loving and teaching our babes like I thought only I could do, and always reminding me that everything is going to be ok, even when I know he is as scared as I am. Nick, you are the love of my life and the most wonderful father to our children. Thank you for holding us together through what I hope is the hardest time in our lives.
On a day when we celebrate Dads, I also have to mention how much I love my Dad so very much. He is in Wisconsin and I got to talk to him today on the phone. While his voice sounded hoarse, it was great to speak with him and tell him I love him and wish him a happy day. As I've mentioned before, my Dad is pretty sick and I so wish I could be with him, especially today. I miss and love you Dad!!!
Tomorrow is Chemo Day #4, which means it's the last of the nasty, harsh, bright red medicine that Nurse Lyndsay administers by hand into my IV from a Jurassic-sized syringe. It's a milestone I've been looking forward to since we started this journey. I'm praying that my side effects are mild like last time. I'm just going to imagine that my Mom is here again to hold my hand. My next chemo medicine is Taxol, which has different, but expectedly gentler side effects. I'm definitely going to need my Xanex tonight to ward off the chemo day jitters which start right about now. I think a big piece of homemade fudge from neighbor Amy and glass of milk will help to start calm my nerves. Ok, that's it for tonight. Like usual, Nick or Rebecca will be blogging for me tomorrow night. I'll be too busy partying with the Chippendales to write (a girl can dream, can't she?)