I know it's a random part of the night, but I seem to be sleeping in 3-hour increments this week (I was warned about this) so I thought I'd take this quiet hour to say Hello! First, some biz-ness. People keep telling me that they want to post comments to the blog, but when they try, they can't figure out how to become a Member, or whatever. So- I made some setting changes so I now think you can post a comment without having to sign up. When they ask you to "comment as" just pick Name/URL and put your name in both spots and it should post just fine. And I love hearing from you, so even if it's just a Hi, feel free to post me a note.
Of course, Fisher takes priority here, after his elbow karate chop through the glass pane of his bedroom french door. I can't believe what a stud he is- see photo! He has not complained once and thinks it's really pretty super cool to have a "cast" (aka, ace bandage) to take to school today to show his friends.
Ok, back to me, my favorite subject (I am very much kidding, I am soooo sick of me). As Wendy blogged, we actually had fun with Lyndsay, my chemo nurse (see photo, she is so cute!) and the actual infusions did not hurt a bit. That evening I had a huge headache and felt like ralphing, but I am a trooper and have yet to yack. Tuesday am was back to the oncologist for a shot of Neulasta that costs $2500- holy shit! We are pretty certain that we qualify for assistance so we only need to pay $50 for each of the four times I need it, thank goodness! The shot is very important because it boosts my white blood cell count by increasing production of bone marrow so I can continue on my "dose dense" treatment of every two weeks for 16 weeks. I was warned that the shot might make me feel like I have the flu, and I did and still do feel crappy, but definitely not terrible. Last night, Nick, Wendy and I stayed up way too late watching funny videos on YouTube. Can you believe she never saw "D*ck in a Box?" Come on, that's a new classic!
Also a word on my oncologist Dr. Wendt. He's great beyond great. He touches my knee when he talks to me, he never uses scary words to send me into hysterics, and he is an Arizona Wildcat. One day when he could tell Nick was feeling overwhelmed, he completely changed the subject to fly fishing for a good 10 minutes and the two of them bonded over one of their favorite shared subjects. He is one of the best oncologists in the state and specializes in breast cancer. I truly feel like he sees me as a daughter and will do everything in his power to get me back up and running. I trust him completely. Here we are together:
Saw my plastic surgeon yesterday and he seems happy with incision healing progress so far. I am still having a lot of discomfort in my chest area, but maybe that's because I have two hard plastic CD sized tissue expanders (but thicker like a shallow pot pie) inserted under the muscles in my chest cavity. Too much detail? Sorry, but it's sucky. I told his nurse that I hated my pressure bra so much that I was going to hit the doctor in the face with it and she said "hit him in the eye, then he won't see me taking nips from the bottle under my desk". Nurses rock.
Sadly, today is the changing of the guard again at home. Nick's sister Wendy is leaving us and we feel scared to see her go. She has been invaluable in every possible way. The way she fluffs my pillows, shaves my armpits, remembers my medicine schedule, wakes up with the kids and makes them gourmet breakfasts so I can sleep, fits me with multiple bras in the Macy's dressing room while politely avoiding my not so fresh body odor and nasty stitches across my chest, fills out our healthcare payment assistance forms, takes copious notes at every doctor's appointment, shampoos the dogs, picks up poops (dogs and diapers), cleans the bubble machine, retrieves lost binkies, and not to mention ruining her favorite pink shirt as Fisher bled and puked on her as she carried him to the car for his first hospital trip. She has been an angel and I love her soooo incredibly much. Thank you Wendy, I will never forget everything you have done for our family.
The good news here is that my big sister Claudia (she is 16 years older, but looks younger than me because of that moist Oregon air, damn it!) is flying in from Portland tonight and will be here for the week to slip into Wendy's shoes. When she arrives at 8pm, Wendy's got an hour to give her the full download before she heads to the airport back to her little family. And here's a shout out to Emma- who turns 10 today and mommy Wendy is here with us. Again, that's love. I hope that many of you will meet Claudia while she is here. She's pretty fricking perfect, and that's not just my opinion. Everyone who meets her falls in love with her, she's dreamy in the most dreamiest of ways. I can't wait to get my arms around her tonight.
I hope I'm on the upswing of the chemo drug effects, and each day will get a little easier. It's nice to know that I will have a week "off" between infusions to hopefully feel like a productive human again (who can't lift anything over 10 pounds). I'm still off diaper changing duty, which is kind of a bonus.
Oh, one more thing, today my beloved hairstylist Laurie for the past 15 years is coming over to the house to give me my new "bob" haircut this afternoon. We all thought that losing my hair might be easier if it came out in 12 inch strands instead of 20 inch strands. At some point I may just have to shave my head (Oh My God!!!), but for now, a new bob sounds like fun. Of course we'll have photos for you asap.